I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize