I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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