Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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