Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
