i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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