oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
nutella sex= disaster
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Randomize
