She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
