It's like God shit irony all over that family
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
How external is "for external use only"?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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