There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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