its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
