i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
