You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize