Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
