The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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