I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
