btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
one might say we're banned from that church
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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