He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
