Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
