So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
