remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
never play flip cup with pint glasses
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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