yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize