I need help removing her.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize