i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
