sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
