Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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