he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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