But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
