the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
