so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize