Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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