shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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