Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Randomize
