Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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