How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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