What a fucking waste of an outfit
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
