did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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