He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize