I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
