I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
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