Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
