Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
