Don't make out with my wife yet
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
