Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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