this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
