he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize