i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
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