ugly people sure do ruin things
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
What drink are we having for lunch?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
