Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
