Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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