Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
