No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
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