If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
