If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
