Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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